Dating is tough and complex no matter what our age. We all go through first dates full of small talk and zero real conversation, waiting for people to text (or text back, which can sometimes be even worse), and wondering why we can’t seem to find our soulmate.
Some aspects of dating are classic, like going on a first date, then a second date, then a third date, then a few more dates and hopefully then defining the relationship. Other parts of dating say a lot about our current time period and culture. Dating in 2018, for example, means that you could get ghosted by someone you went out with, and that might not be something that people really talked about before.
If you’re dating in your 30s, maybe you went through a bad breakup and are now on your own again, or you’ve been solo for a while. If you’re dating in your 60s, you might have lost a spouse or have gotten divorced. While there are decades between these two ages, they have one thing in common: there are some tough things about dating during this time of your life. Read on to find out 20 harsh realities of people dating in their 30s vs dating in their 60s in 2018.
20 – Dating In Their 30s: You Have To Deal With Dating Apps
It’s a fact of life these days: people date by using dating apps. There are so many out there and while some are more popular or trendy (or user-friendly) than others, you definitely have a lot of choices.
When you’re dating in your 30s, you have to use dating apps.
Sure, you might not want to go nuts and download a whole bunch of them, but you at least want to use a few.
This is a harsh reality since dating via dating apps can be a really wild ride. There are so many people swiping left and right and there are tons of horror tales out there of dates that didn’t go so well. It can feel boring and tiring to keep swiping, wondering when you’re going to meet your true match.
19 – Dating In Their 60s: You Might Not Want To Use A Dating App Or Try Online Dating
Those dating in their 60s might still consider dating via dating apps or setting up an online dating profile. If this is your experience, then you might have friends who are trying to get you to sign up for a site that worked for them (or a friend of theirs). Or maybe your daughter or son really wants you to meet someone and thinks that a dating app is the best way to go.
You might not be interested in using a dating app and you want to do other things with your time. You might be nervous about essentially meeting a stranger from the Internet, which is what this is.
18 – Dating In Their 30s: Your Friends Are All Getting Engaged And You Feel Left Out
While some people aren’t getting married at all, many couples get engaged once they reach their 30s. It feels like a great time since your careers are mostly squared away and you’re thinking about where the future will lead you.
Being single in your 30s can feel extra tough because everywhere you turn, someone new has just gotten engaged.
Your friends are all in the middle of planning their weddings and you might be a bridesmaid or Maid of Honor for some of them. You’re happy for them, but it definitely sucks to talk about the bad first date that you just went on when they’re staring down happily ever after. You feel left out of the process and wish that you had someone, too.
17 – Dating In Their 60s: Your Friends Can’t Relate To The Single Life And Are Grandparents Or Close To It
The 60s are basically the new 40s and many people are looking younger than their age and doing great. They’re working out, keeping busy, trying new things and taking up new hobbies, and enjoying life. It’s super inspiring.
If this is you and you find yourself single in your 60s, either because you’re divorced, you lost a spouse, or you’ve been on your own for a while, you realize pretty quickly that your friends just can’t relate to your situations. They’re married and they could even be grandparents by now. They’re in the midst of happy family times and you’re trying to meet someone.
16 – Dating In Their 30s: You Don’t Want To Be Single And Dating Because You Thought You Would Have Met Someone By Now
Many women feel that by the big 3-0, it’s absolutely time to meet the love of their life. You might feel this way too, and you might feel that dating sucks because you thought you would have met someone by now.
No one really imagines that by their 30th birthday, they’ll still be single.
You hope that with each passing year, you’ll go on enough dates and meet enough people that you’ll have a chance at love. Simply put, you wish that you weren’t single and dating. You wish that you were in a serious relationship or engaged or married.
15 – Dating In Their 60s: You Have A Smaller Dating Pool Because People Are Married
The truth of being in your 60s is that people are married and have been for a while now. The dating pool gets much smaller and even if you do try online dating, it’s possible that you don’t find many people in your area, particularly if you live in a small town or community.
Your friends know a lot of married couples. Even if your kids have some coworkers your age or a bit younger, they could be married as well. It can feel discouraging for sure and it can feel like when you were younger, you had a lot more choice and there were more single people around.
14 – Dating In Their 30s: You Don’t Want To Waste Time So Dates Aren’t As Fun As They Used To Be
Dating at 18 or even 25 can be pretty fun. You go on lots of dates and it doesn’t matter if you found your soulmate or someone who you could see yourself walking down the aisle with. Grabbing a drink and laughing for an hour is all that you really care about, and if it leads to more, cool. If not, it’s no big deal.
A harsh reality of dating in your 30s is that dating just isn’t that much fun anymore. You don’t want to waste time.
You want to meet someone who you can see yourself with, and you want to make sure that he’s right for you and that he’s serious about finding someone to commit to. It feels like a lot.
13 – Dating In Their 60s: Dating Is Harder Because Some Men Are Divorced And Bring Baggage
You’re in your 60s and you decide you want to start dating again. You go on a few first dates, hopeful and thinking that it might go okay… and you realize that men your age have a lot of baggage.
By this decade, many people who are in the dating pool once again are divorced, and they’re bringing all of that baggage to the table. That might not be something that you want to deal with (okay, it’s absolutely not something that you want to deal with). At this point in your life, you want to enjoy yourself and you don’t want to hear stories about someone’s ex or be involved in drama.
12 – Dating In Their 30s: You’re Worried You’ll Miss Your Chance To Start A Family
If you want to have kids, then you know that there is such a thing as a biological clock and that you have to have kids by a certain age (at least biologically). There are so many different ways to become a family and so many choices out there, such as adoption, but if you want to experience pregnancy, this is something that is on your radar.
It’s especially difficult to date in your 30s when you want to be a mom in the next few years.
When you’re not close to being in a serious relationship, you start to get worried. You don’t want to miss out on your chance to start a family and it’s very stressful.
11 – Dating In Their 60s: You Haven’t Dated In Decades And Feel Out Of The Loop
Dating is always the same, or at least beings the same way: two people have dinner, coffee, or drinks together and talk and hopefully get along. If they want to keep dating, then they do (which is the best case scenario, of course).
When you’re single and dating in your 60s, you might find this a bit tricky. You might not have dated in decades if you’re newly on your own because of divorce or the loss of a spouse. You feel out of the loop and like you’re not sure how to do this. If you meet the right person, it would be worth it and could go well, but it makes sense that you might be apprehensive.
10 – Dating In Their 30s: Your Friends Have Already Set You Up With Everyone So You Can’t Meet People That Way
By your 30s, you’ve been on a few dates that were set-ups and your friends don’t have anyone left that they can introduce you to.
This is a shame if you’re done dating by apps or want to try another way of meeting people.
It always seems like couples meet through friends or maybe come across each other at a party or event, and it would be awesome if this happened to you, too.
But unfortunately, you’ve either met all of the single men that your friends know and things didn’t work out, or you didn’t think that you two would work out.
9 – Dating In Their 60s: Your Friends Don’t Know Any Single Men To Set You Up With
Set-ups can be really tricky. People want you to be happy and in a good relationship and if they know other single people, they think that setting you two up is a great idea.
It can be, but it can also go poorly. At least when you’re younger, it seems like people have some single friends or coworkers and there are some people to introduce to you. Once you reach your 60s and find yourself single, your friends might not know any single men to set you up with. They could all be married at this point. This is tough since it makes the dating pool smaller.
8 – Dating In Their 30s: You Have So Much Dating Experience That You’ve Become Super Cynical
Single women in their 30s know what’s going on. They’ve been dating for years now and have gone on many types of dates. They’ve gone on weird dates, had dull evenings, walked out of dates, tried to date someone who wasn’t their type, dated only their type, been set up, tried dating apps, been in long-term relationships… They’ve done it all.
You’re super experienced when it comes to dating and that can make you cynical.
When you go on a first date, you might not think that it’s going to be awesome. It’s a harsh reality that you can’t be as cheerful as you used to be.
7 – Dating In Their 60s: Even If You Meet Someone You Like, Their Children Might Not Support The Relationship
If you date someone with kids, what they think of you is really important. Of course, you’re amazing and they should love you, but that’s not always the way that it goes.
It’s an unfortunate reality that dating in your 60s could mean finding someone you get along with and then realizing that their children don’t support the relationship. There could be reasons that they don’t want the two of you to be together that have nothing to do with you (like maybe they wish that their parents were still together). But it’s still something that you have to deal with.
6 – Dating In Their 30s: You Have To Worry About Getting Ghosted And You Feel Too Mature To Deal With That
You want to be mature by your 30s. You want to feel like you have everything together, from doing your job perfectly to keeping your home clean to cooking healthy dinners to seeing your friends often. You want to be a kind, caring person who others like, and it matters to you to be a grown-up.
Another harsh reality of dating during this decade involves ghosting. You know that ghosting is a fact of dating in 2018.
You might get ghosted… and you feel way too mature to have to deal with that.
It sucks to think that people would do this to you instead of just saying that they don’t want to go on a second or third date.
5 – Dating In Their 60s: You’re Used To Being Independent And It’s Hard To Adjust To A Relationship
Being a single woman in your 60s means that you’re totally awesome. You’ve been on your own, you’re still working because you love your career or you’ve decided to retire, you might have kids (or kids and grandkids) that you love, and you’re an interesting person.
Maybe you’ve been single for a while now, and it’s tough to adjust to the idea of starting a new relationship. Even if you meet someone that you like and want to try dating, you could realize that it feels strange to have someone in your life. This is normal for sure, and it’s a reality of this situation.
4 – Dating In Their 30s: It’s One More Thing To Be Stressed Out About (On Top Of Your Career And Personal Life)
By your 30th birthday, you have a lot going on. You’ve got your dream job or are making plans to get it, you’re busy with whatever job you do have, you have some things that you love to do outside of work, and you have a social life to keep up with.
You feel like dating is just one more thing to worry about, and it stresses you out.
You’re already thinking about your career 24/7… and now you have to think about whether you want to go out with that guy who just asked you out even though there are a few red flags. It feels like a lot to deal with. It feels like if you were in a relationship by now, things would be much simpler and less stressful.
3 – Dating In Their 60s: You Have To Think If This Person Could Be A Good Grandparent To Your Grandkids (Past Or Present)
When you’re younger and dating and you want to start a family someday, you wonder if the guy you’re dating would make a great dad. If he has certain qualities, like kindness and compassion and a great work ethic, that could be great news.
When you’re in your 60s and dating, you might be thinking if someone would make a great grandparent to your grandkids. Maybe your kids already have children of their own so this is definitely something that is relevant and on your mind. Or your daughter might be pregnant or thinking of getting pregnant in the next few years, so it’s still something that you have to consider.
2 – Dating In Their 30s: You Wonder If People You Would Typically Match With Are Already Coupled Up
It’s a bit depressing to think that all the good guys are taken or coupled up by the time that you hit 30. It might be true, though, or at least it might feel true.
A harsh reality of dating in your 30s could be swiping constantly and not finding anyone who you feel is a great match.
You could go on date after date and feel like if you were just a few years younger, you might have met someone perfect for you, but he met his current wife and now he’s happy. It’s easy to feel like when you were in college, there were so many potential partners, and now people have paired off and the dating pool is smaller.
1 – Dating In Their 60s: The Older You Get, The More Complicated Dating And Relationships Get
Another harsh reality of dating in your 60s is that as you get older, dating gets a lot more complicated. This is true when you’re in your 30s, too, since people are thinking more seriously about finding a lifelong partner and someone to start a family with.
This is particularly true in your 60s since you’re thinking about who you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. You don’t want to settle and become miserable, and at this time in your life, it feels important to find someone who is really special. Relationships feel more complicated because everyone has been through so much and experienced so much in life.
Even though this is tough, it’s good to remember that dating at any age is tricky. Despite that, finding love is worth the wait.