Even if a relationship is going well, it can be tough for some people say “I love you.” And that’s totally understandable. Dropping the L word is a big deal, and it shouldn’t be taken lightly. But when it comes to astrology, there are a few zodiac signs who may struggle to say “I love you” more than others.
This has to a lot to do with what each sign prioritizes in life. Some signs like to be double and triple sure they’re ready to make a commitment, before they even hint at being in love. Others value their independence, and thus aren’t too keen on settling down with just anyone. And others simply have a tendency to overthink things.
Whatever the reason, though, it’s 100 percent possible for anyone to have a healthy, happy relationship — regardless of the traits inherent to their sun sign. “Love, relationships, and compatibility are so much more complex and involved than the sun sign,” professional astrologer Rachel Lang tells Bustle. “Each person has an entire natal chart that reflects the planetary placements of all the planets at the time of birth, and each one symbolizes a different aspect of the person’s life as well as personality.”
So just because someone is a Gemini or a Capricorn or a Virgo — just a few signs that may have trouble saying “I love you” — it doesn’t mean they can’t or won’t find love. “Two people in partnership together create and define any relationship potentiality,” Lang says. “Compatibility is so much more than the sun sign alone.” Here, the five signs that are most likely to put off saying “I love you,” according to experts.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Since Gemini loves to have new experiences, they aren’t always the quickest to commit to a relationship — much less drop heavy words like love. “They need to keep things interesting, and it takes a special partner to do that over the long term,” Lang says. “In addition, Gemini can be quite curious about other people, especially if they’re not entirely attached. They might fall into the ‘grass is greener on the other side’ mentality in all areas of life, but especially relationships.”
That’s not to say they don’t want a long-term relationship, or that they won’t eventually fall in love. As Lang says, “Once they do make a commitment, they tend to allow themselves to go deeper, expressing thoughts and emotions freely with their partner. They will keep their partner on their toes, and they often keep relationships fresh and exciting. Therefore, they can be engaging partners. They can also make excellent communicators.”
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
If anyone’s going to overthink a relationship, it’ll be Virgo. “They may want to make sure everything is perfect before making a commitment or saying ‘I love you,'” Lang says. “When they fall in love, perfectionistic tendencies can lead Virgo to question the truth in their hearts. After all, no one is perfect, and therefore, Virgo could delay settling into a relationship.”
It can help Virgo to keep in mind that, in many cases, their perfectionism is often based in fears and worries that are unfounded. “Once Virgo faces fear and has the courage to step forward in a relationship, they make incredible partners,” Lang says. “They are generous, thoughtful, and great conversation partners. They also have a good sense of humor.”
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
As a fixed sign, Scorpio tends to resist change. “Therefore, when they do commit to a relationship, they have a tendency to stay in it, for better or for worse,” Lang says. “But because of this, when Scorpio does say, ‘I love you,’ they mean it whole-heartedly.”
If they find someone they truly care about, they aren’t going to take these three words lightly, Lang says. “They take their time and make sure the relationship is solid before being vulnerable in expressing their affection. Once they’re in, though, they stay for the long term.”
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)
As an earth sign, Capricorn is goal-oriented — and incredibly practical. “They do not rush into love but take steady steps forward, making sure the relationship meets their practical sensibilities and is solid before making a commitment,” Lang says.
It’s also not uncommon for them to leave relationships at the first sign of trouble. “If Capricorn can’t see a future with someone, they will call off the romance,” Lang says. “They tend not to invest time and energy into a relationship without longevity.” They don’t mess around, and that’s a good thing. But it can be frustrating for their partners who just want them to commit.
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)
As one of the most free-spirited signs, Aquarius tends “to have a need for independence, which can be challenging for intimate relationships,” Lang says. They’re often nontraditional when it comes to dating, and may take a long time to say “I love you” as a result. But that doesn’t mean they’re anti-love.
Once they find the right partner, they’ll be all about making a commitment. But it tends to take a lot of time. “If they are going to sacrifice personal freedom,” Lang says, “they want to make sure the relationship is healthy and allows them to be themselves.”
While that’s totally understandable, it can be frustrating for their partners, who may desire a more predictable relationship path. “That said, Aquarians make committed partners when they do finally meet their person,” Lang says. “Even if they desire a more non-traditional relationship, once they decide to go in, they go in whole-heartedly.”
It’s true that some signs struggle to say “I love you.” But that doesn’t mean they can’t or won’t, once they’re in a healthy relationship. Oftentimes, due to their inherent personality traits, these folks prefer to ease into things and see how they feel before making a big commitment. And that’s more than OK.